Editor’s Note: With regard to our topic for discussion “Is it hard to kick Vietnamese’s bad habits?”, Tuoitrenews continues receiving stories from expats and foreign visitors. Among them is a piece by a U.S. veteran who regularly visits Vietnam. In his article, he says that it is an exaggeration to think that "bad habits" are everywhere in Vietnam, adding that every country has "habits" that might be unacceptable to foreigners. The writer wants to stay anonymous.

I first visited Vietnam in 1995. This visit opened my eyes to the history and beauty of Vietnam and its people, and I have subsequently visited this country many times after I retired from my regular job.

Now please allow me to express some personal thoughts and opinions concerning the topic for discussion in this column: 

1. There is no doubt that there are many "habits" or "behaviors" in Vietnam today that would not be acceptable in the more developed countries. However, most of these habits will inevitably change as Vietnam continues to develop, and as more Vietnamese travel internationally. It is bound to happen. When my Vietnamese friends express their impatience about change in Vietnam, I always have to remind them that today's Vietnam started to change only after Doi Moi or Renovation [the name given to the economic reforms initiated in Vietnam in 1986], and that's less than 30 years ago. Only one generation. In that short time, so much change has occurred that it's almost unbelievable. In many ways, the rate of material change has been faster than even in the U.S. or Europe.

2. Of course, the easiest changes are the material changes: people have better clothing, housing (even in the countryside), food, cell phones, motorbikes or autos, even travel opportunities. I call these "hardware" changes since they are comparatively easy to make. The "software" changes (in other words, changes in attitude, culture, behavior, etc.) will take longer because these are changes in how people think. And "manners" and "habits" are in the "software" of many Vietnamese people, and so it will take more than one generation to bring significant changes.

3. But it is an exaggeration to think that "bad habits" are everywhere in Vietnam. I have met many, many Vietnamese (including in the countryside) who are every bit as polite and well-mannered as people elsewhere. And many Vietnamese people themselves recognize and disapprove of "bad habits." I will always remember talking with a tour guide on a boat during a visit to Ha Long Bay some years ago. I asked him about the tour business, and I learned that the Chinese are the biggest group of tourists to Vietnam. I thought that meant good business for the tourist industry, but he said that they didn't like dealing with Chinese tourists, because of their "bad habits" like spitting, tossing rubbish into the bay, rudeness, etc. 

4. One theory I've heard is that these "bad habits" are not part of Vietnamese culture, but are in fact new behavior brought out by the rapid growth of Vietnam. I have heard this many times from people in Hanoi who are from the "old families" who have lived in the city for many generations. They told me that in old Vietnam, people behaved politely and well, spoke softly, etc. But after the war, public behavior deteriorated with the huge influx of people coming into the cities, causing great crowding and stress, traffic jams unheard of before, and more competition for food and services, etc. As this population pressure is smoothed out in the future, behavior will hopefully go back to something more "normal," according to this theory.

5. One thing to keep in mind is that every country has "habits" that might be unacceptable to foreigners. I have seen that the French don't seem to queue and Parisians are unwelcoming to foreigners; I'm told the Arabs belch at the dinner table; I have been shoved aside by Chinese swarming around ticket counters, etc., etc. So it's really the worst kind of arrogance and condescension for a foreigner to go to another country and make public pronouncements about what kinds of behavior he finds unacceptable. He should simply avoid those situations he doesn't like and keep his opinions to himself – or just express them to those other foreigners who live in those self-contained, segregated "expat bubbles." 

I think the topic is interesting and the most persuasive opinions would be from other Vietnamese, including those who have traveled and seen the world, or even from the government through educational campaigns (as the Chinese government did before the Beijing Olympics, or what the French government is trying to do to make the Parisian waiters less rude).